A New Russian (NR) is stopped by a traffic policeman, who opens his car's trunk and sees a Kalashnikoff automatic rifle there.
- What the hell is that supposed to be? - policeman asks.
- It's a calculator, - replies the NR.
- Gimme a break, - the policeman protests, producing a calculator from his pocket, - Now here's a calculator...
- Different models, - the NR explains. - Yours is for preliminary score, and mine is for final ones.

A New Russian comes from a visit to the States.
- The country is so much like Russia, - he concludes, - You know, their dollars look just like our bucks!..

A New Russian tells his friends, that he's gonna try boarding a trolleybus the next day. Everybody is dying from curiosity, and the next day his friends come to his office, to hear about his impressions.
- I didn't make it, - he confesses sadly.
- How come?!
- They do not let people board a trolleybus with their Volvos...

!!! MOST Beautiful Russian girls !!!

A New Russian's son approaches a gorgeous lady in a lobby of five-star Metropol hotel.
- Mind a stroll? - he volunteers.
- Well, I bet your car ain't a Volvo, - she replies.
- Nope, it is not, - he confides.
- And you do not own even an average size bank, - she continues.
- Nope, - he admits again.
- And you don't have a three-storey house in Old Arbat, - she concludes. He agrees again. - Then get lost, miser!
The lady leaves, and the chap stands in distressed puzzlement.
- I can trade my Saab 900 for a Volvo, - he muses to himself, - and I can split my financial trust into a chain of average-size banks, but I obviously can't talk my father into demolishing the top three floors of our Old Arbat residence...

An New Russian (NR) comes into a car dealership and asks for a silver Mercedes 600SEL. The employee shows him the car, receives the payment and asks with much curiosity:
- Excuse me, sir, but didn't you buy exactly same car three days ago?
- I sure did, - retorts the NR, - But in that one the ashtray is filled up already!!!